Desensitized

Desensitized 1: (to make a sensitized or hypersensitive individual) insensitive or nonreactive to a sensitizing agent.
2: to make emotionally insensitive or callous; specifically : to extinguish an emotional response (as of fear, anxiety, or guilt) to stimuli that formerly induced it.

Why is it that society in general has become so desensitized to so many things? This question has always bothered me. And after a week spent on and off in the quick care here in Nevada with 2 very sick children, it has been heavily weighing on my mind.

Why is it that I can sit in quick care full of people, for 2 hours with a very sick boy not just crying, but screaming in pain. Not only making a huge scene, but has pussy fluid draining from his ears, and not 1 person on staff even shows any kind of compassion, or concern.

And when I finally ask if they can give him something for pain, they act as if I am asking them to shoot my child up with heroin or something.

I mean come on, I know they are busy, and see a whole lot of people in one day. And I'm sure there are always the big druggies who come in to get their fix, but SERIOUSLY! This is an 8 year old child with an ear drum rupturing! And all I'm asking for after many sleepless nights spent awake worrying is for some relief!

I often wonder why many of these people chose health care as their career. I have encountered many heartless people in my lifetime, but lucky for us all none of them chose health care as their career. Maybe it's because I came from Logan, where unfortunately we spent many a trip to the E.R. in my kids younger years. But I know for a fact, they never would of let this happen there.
Logan Regional is known for maybe not being one of the best hospitals as far as care in the area. But I would beg to differ. My family and I were almost always treated with care, compassion, and respect on our many late nights spent in that hospital. And I am now finding out just how rare that is nowadays.

It is like being kicked while you are already down. After spending a week and a half holding, worrying about, and taking care of sick kids, do they really think I want to be there? And then we FINALLY get called back and without any apologies for the horrendous wait, they say "Well weren't you just here a week ago?" In a very condescending almost sarcastic tone. And I feel like telling them "YES, I was and if you weren't in such a freaking hurry to rush us out of here, you would have realized the severity of the infection they have, and given us the "stronger" medicine from the start"! Which is the only thing they did different this time. So basically I just put my very sick child through hell waiting there for 2 hours for a "stronger" medication.

And I had to strongly stand my ground, and basically BEG on my hands and knees to get him anything for pain. I was finally successful, and what a difference it quickly made! It even put him to sleep. And all I could think is, if they only would of given that to him 2 hours ago, not only would it have helped him endure the long wait, but it would of saved us all in that room our own eardrums!

The reason I was at quick care at all is because my own pediatrician, who I spoke with personally at 10:00 that morning so she could hear herself just how much pain Teigen was in informed me she could not see him until 2:00. And all along I thought "your" doctor will always have "your" best concerns at heart. I know every doctors office plans for and has slots open for emergencies, or she could of at least said, "Just come in, and there might be a wait, but I will fit you in." Is that asking to much? Am I crazy? Well I can now say that she will no longer be my pediatrician. If your own doctor can not show compassion or help you out when things get this bad, then it is time to find a new one. And that is just what I am doing today.

This has all felt like dejavu and has reminded me of when I got my first kidney stone, and was fairly new to this desensitized town, and from the time I was rushed to the E.R. in the worst pain of my life, thinking I would finally get the help and relief I needed! And although I'm sure most of you probably remember. To make a long story short, I was treated so poor and callously along
the way it took me 4 weeks to finally find a doctor who cared, and was willing to immediately do surgery to help relieve my pain.

And as we are still sitting waiting to see the doctor, a nurse finally came in to check his vitals. As she was in there she instantly started sneezing, and very rudely asked me if I was wearing perfume. Which I quickly figured out she must be allergic too. So I had to think hard to even remember if in the quick race of trying to get there if I did maybe stop to put on a squirt or two. So I just told her yes, and I quickly apologized (as if I knew she would be allergic)! So she just gave me a dirty look and left! Never to be seen again. And all along I am thinking, "LADY, you should be thanking me, that I took the 2 seconds this morning to actually put perfume on, seeing how I can't even remember the last time I showered in the last week and a half!" But whatever, once again if you are SO allergic, and being such a poopy pants, just because I put on perfume then maybe you should not be working with the public! I'm sure I wasn't the first!

So to top the day off, as I go to pick up the "stronger" medicine, that I should have had a week ago. The pharmacy informed me the ear drops would be $130.00! Talk about kick me while I'm down! Are you kidding me? I had just paid a hefty penny for both kids medications a few days before, not including the quick care charges. Which is part of life I guess, but seriously $130.00??? And after I caught my breath, and picked my chin up off the floor, I questioned the lady at the pharmacy if that was before or after insurance she told me she wouldn't know until It was filled. And either way I had to have it, so when I went to pick it up she kindly informed me, that she was able to get it lowered to $50.00! Which I was still flabbergasted by, but either way I had to have it. And as she kindly explained the dosage, and commented on my sick child slumped over in the front seat, and told me how cute he is and sympathized with him, and told him she hopes he gets feeling better soon, along with a warming sincere smile! And then apologized for how expensive the medication is.

I drove away thinking to myself, there are good people in this world! If she only knew how much her smile and simple compassion alone meant to me at that point in the day. I know there are many great people in the health "care "system, and I understand that there are certain people that go into these places day after day that make these people want to put their guard up. But I don't and will never understand the lack of compassion in so many people I come across on a daily basis. It makes me sad to think how desensitized we have become as a society. On so many levels.

My kiddo's are finally doing better today, after both eardrums rupturing. Thanks to all my friends who have been here this week to help from bringing me "numbing ear drops" at 10:00 at night, to the Pepsi on ice that worked miracles all in itself. (That was my kind of morphine)!Thanks to my family for the "listening ear" and the always fun packages in the mail! (They know how a package can quickly perk the kids up)! And for always being there the best they can long distance. And Thanks to my awesome husband for all he has done to take care of us, and to listen to me whine and complain, while he was away feeling helpless. Fortunately I have been able to surround myself with some of the best, most compassionate people on this earth! And it is these people who help me keep my faith in humanity!

I am not writing this post to make you feel bad for me, because today things are much much better. I have just been thinking so much, probably because that's all I 've had to do! I am just asking everyone who is still with me, after such a long post. To take this week to SMILE! Or speak a kind word, or try to help someone in need, and lets change this cold, sometimes callous world we live in one person at a time!

I am now on a blogging hiatus... at least for a while. I now have a lot of catching up to do, and a lot going on in our lives right now! Hope to be back soon... but now worries, there is always facebook!